Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
