She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
