Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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