You're my little dorito
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
