im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
It's never too late to be topless.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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