I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
