Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
