I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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