You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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