Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize