She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
