You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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