My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
