All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
