And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Dicks are not precious.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
