How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Randomize