That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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