RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
