you're like a bully in the Christmas story
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
