Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
