Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize