Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
