# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
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her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
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I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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