Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
