I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Mom said you looked used
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
