We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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