hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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