He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
