I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize