I heard we made out
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Randomize
