At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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