1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize