Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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