A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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