I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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