We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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