Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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