So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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