Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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