direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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