Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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