I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I think people are normalizing furries
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
