Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
