with your own penis?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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