Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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