How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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