And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
