Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Someone shattered a urinal.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
