dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
