covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize